New Beginning.

Tomorrow I move. I start college Monday. I'll be gone for 16 months all together. It's going to be a big change. A good start. A new beginning. Something I've been needing, wanting. .

I'm excited, nervous, anxious, scared, worried, happy, sad. Everything. It's a big jumble of mixed emotions.
I'm going to miss my parents, my dog and my boyfriend like mad.
Knowing that it's something I love to do, and am excited about starting, makes it a little bit easier.
Being gone for 16 months isn't what really scares me. It's the amount of changes that will be occuring during that time that does. Wondering if everything will work out as I hope, or if everything will change, but not in the ways I want.

I hope it brings us closer, even though we'll be distanced.
I hope it gives myself and others a new appreciation for each other.
Things have been taken for granted lately. I think that's due to seeing each other everyday, anytime whenever we want.
That's going to be the hard part. Not being able to talk everyday, let alone see eachother everyday.

I have major separation issues, so this doesn't help at all.
Especially with my fear of losing those close to me.
I can't help but think that my last chance will be taken away from me.

I've had it happen before, I've seen it happen. And it's the worst feeling in the world. Wishing you put more effort into seeing those people, and never having the chance to make up for it.

I guess with these changes, I can't help but think the worst of certain things. I guess I'm a pretty pessimistic person, when I should be being more optimistic.
This is a good opportunity. I am doing something I enjoy, I'll finally have a career path to follow. I'll be able to travel and accomplish things easier once I'm out of school. I'll get to do what I want and enjoy doing, rather than working for money and hating every second of it.

Life always has huge changes, good or bad. We have to accept them and take them as they come. They make us who we are, whether we like the way they turn out or not.

We just have to take it Day By Day.

I think it's pretty awesome how you completely ignore me but talk to the person who started everything in the first place.

I find it funny how if I hadn't of made the call, you two probably wouldn't be talking again.

I love how I'm the one that made the effort to fix everything, got everything cleared up, made a gateway for you two to start talking again.. & I'm the one that gets left out of everything?

What the fuck.

Whoa, wait?

So, today I re-connected with tumblr.
I deleted my old one..
made a new one.
& I think you should definitely check it out.

Ask me questions, or follow me.
whatever you would like.
I may end up being on there more often then here now..
But we'll see.

anyways, here's the link
The Forbidden Zone

Ily.

I Love You .

♥

Nights, like tonight.